Dear normal, socially accepted person,
There are some important things you should probably know about. Take it from me, I used to be like you. If I could step back in time, I just might. Consider this a warning.
I remember being normal. It was great. I didn’t have to worry about getting weird looks, people backing away, or suffering an endless barrage of public scrutiny. Ah, the life.
But, something remarkable happened. I became a father.
I didn’t expect it. I mean, nobody ever pulled me aside and said, “Dude, when you have kids you are gonna caaaaare….” or “Bro, when you become a dad it’s like getting hit with a brick wall of sudden responsibility.” or, “Son, I love you, but you’re also a huge pain in the neck sometimes. I mean, I constantly have to worry about your health, your future, and your general well being. It’s just not what we signed up for…”
Thanks a lot for the tip, friends and family. It’s apparently your fault I didn’t know what to expect.
I was basically still just a kid inside; just a 200 pound one that could grow a beard. It was awesome.
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